Diffusing the Drama

Dealing with the embarrassment of being with an angry person can be very awkward. Here are some ways to minimise their anger.

    1. Don’t fuel it with your anger – stay positive in what you say, let your own anger drift out of your mind and remember it’s harder to negotiate with an angry person so don’t bother.

2. Relax your body – think animal kingdom, we know when an animal looks ready to pounce, relax your body so you don’t send the wrong messages and fuel their anger further.

    3. Keep yourself safe – check where the exits are

4. Acknowledge how they feel – hear them out, they are clearly angry over something, reflect it back to them … “I can hear how irritated you are, I’m glad you’re saying so”.

    5. Speak from yourself – easiest way to diffuse a difficult situation, no one can argue with how you feel because they are your feelings… “I feel frightened when that happened”.

6. Demonstrate active listening – if we think we’ve been heard we usually calm down, “I can hear you’re annoyed at me because …”. No one likes being ignored.

    7. Meet them half way – make a gesture by apologising, compromising, regretting, accepting responsibility and demonstrate you’d like to move forward positively form this.

8. Be heard – repeat what you want them to hear until they’ve got it – calm, collected and kindly keep saying what you think too, you are a part of that relationship too.

    9. Fogging – take the wind out of their sails by admitting they are right, “you’re selfish!” ….” Sometimes I can put myself first…” – don’t be fooled this isn’t agreeing, it’s shows you have respect for what they say and are valuing them.

    Credit: http://pixabay.com/en/finger-provocation-rebel-422529/

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